Pam Ann, the air hostess comedienne to the stars (Elton John and Madonna have been counted among her fans), is touching down for a month-long residency in New York City. We caught up with Pam during her whirlwind tour preparations to ask her about being a filthy b*tch, her cure for jet lag (not for kids or the weak of heart) and her favourite airlines.
Were you the funny girl at school? Or the wallflower?
I was super shy. I didn’t talk or say anything till I was 21 years old. I am certainly making up for lost time now.
Why does your act resonate with so many people? What is it about flying & flight attendants?
I guess we all travel and share the same experiences…plus I am a filthy b*tch, and we all relate to that – don’t we?
How do you tackle jet lag?
Stay up and don’t go to sleep if you can help it. Have a line, go to the clubs, f*ck up your body clock so much that you have no idea what time of the day it is.
What is your favourite airline? If they’re really bad, do they contribute more to your material?
There is no one airline that stands out as the overall winner. I like a bit from most of them:
- SAS for being the most gay friendly airline
- Lufthansa for their efficiency and punctuality
- KLM for their Delft Houses
- British Airways for their Club Class flat beds and their new training program ‘What would Kate (Middleton) do’
- JetBlue for their on board TV and friendliness
- AA for the oldest crew in the world
- US Airways for landing on water
- LOT for not having landing gear
- Virgin Atlantic for their pornographic seat demo and hottest cabin crew who finger f*ck you at the bar
- Emirates for owning more Airbus A380’s in the world than any other airline could ever afford and ordering the most Boeing 777’s in the history of Boeing
- Singapore Airlines for their air hostess uniform and service
- Qantas for risking their lives everyday
- Ryan Air for being C*NTS!
But my favourite airline is of course my airline, Pam Ann Airlines, which is everything above and more…and all airlines are great for material – good and bad!
What do you think of (The ABC series) PAN AM? Will we see you guest appear on it?
Style over substance. If they asked me I would absolutely make an appearance and show those b*tches how it should’ve been done!
Do other flight attendants recognise you (in your normal clothes) on flights?
It’s one of the biggest perks of being Pam Ann. I love flying First Class on an economy ticket.
If topics you do comedy on are like destinations, where will Pam Ann NOT go?
I will go everywhere. The word ‘NOT’ is never in my vocabulary.
What are the stewards on Air Force 1 like?
Secretive. Definitely a crew I would hire in a second.
If the Vatican had an airline what would you expect on board?
Lots of inappropriate touching.
Pam Ann is playing at The Triad in NYC every Thursday in February.
Congratulations to Alex Rozenweig, winner of two tickets to see Pam Ann live this month.